Our bodies hold all of our emotional memories.
Especially memories with a high emotional charge - Both positive and negative.
Emotional memories with a high positive emotional charge are great when they can bring a smile to our face, some warmth and comfort in our hearts, and they remind us of the awe and wonder in life.
Emotional memories with a positive emotional charge are not so great when we use them as a comparison point, or we are constantly seeking to replicate that state of mind and experience of life - for nothing will live up to it. We become attached, we crave for life to live up to an expectation of a memory that once was - and we reject the present moment for what it is. We become fearful of change. Fearful of the unknown. Fearful of loss.
Emotional memories with a high negative emotional charge are positive when the body takes over the mind to protect us from physical danger. It is when our reflexes stop us from falling over to hurt ourselves or when we're driving and we swerve away from a potential accident.
Emotional memories with a high negative emotional charge do not work for us when we are in constant fear of the situation repeating itself. We control life, we control our surroundings, we are fearful of the unknown, and fearful of not having all the answers - we are run by the program of Fear not knowing that Fear is in the driver seat.
What does this have to do with Motherhood?
Heightened emotions can take us out of the present moment. Presence is stillness. Presence is access to love. When we are present we welcome the unknown and we meet the moment where it is.
When we show up in Motherhood from the state of self-sacrifice, suffering, victim, martyr and surviving - we are allowing our emotional memories to run the show. We feel that the area's of life that matter to us are all in conflict. That life is about compromise and we don't have a say. We are reactive.
We think that if family life is thriving, our career or passion has to be on hold. We feel that if we are soaring in our career, that family life will suffer. We don't make time for our self because well - that's the last thing on our mind! "I don't have time to make time for myself..." we say.
The experience of busy, of juggling, and "doing" is way more tempting than investing the energy and effort to confront the emotional addictions of our bodies.....Because then, that means we no longer can defend life with being the victim or martyr, suffering, surviving, and self-sacrifice.
When we are present, we are making space for all emotions. We make space to feel the emotions, to understand what they are trying to tell us, we make space to listen, and we make space to bring compassion and kindness.
When our child is crying, feeling unsettled - it is asking us to meet it where it is. When we make space and we meet it with Love, the experience is dissolved. There is calm.
This is meeting Fear with Love.
Have you ever noticed, that when your child is upset, and you meet their Fear with your own Fear - how much does the situation escalate? The crying gets even louder.
This is meeting Fear with Fear.
When we are in a state of Fear - that is, a heightened emotional state - it is asking us to meet it with Love.
Our anger, our frustration, our suffering, our self-sacrifice, our compromise, our angst, our guilt, our shame, our upset, any emotion that lives in our body that creates a reaction away from our highest and truest self - is asking for Love. Only Love can liberate.
If we don't know how or have been taught to meet Fear with Love - we will continue to fight with Fear, ignore Fear, run away from Fear and do whatever we can to numb the Fear.
In that state - we feel disconnected. Life is bittersweet - and we start contracting.
In knowing that Fear is an emotional reaction that lives in our bodies - we now have the power.
Fear really doesn't want to run the show - It is desperately seeking to be seen, heard, understood and be met with Love.
This isn't about having Motherhood be perfect or showing up as the perfect mother - it is about building a stronger relationship with our self which will then have an incredible ripple effect on all area's of our life - including our experience as a mother.
The most important relationship that we will ever have, is the relationship with our self.
Everything in reality, how we experience life, is borne from the love, the relationship, and the connection we have with our self.
And therein lies the gift of Motherhood.
The gift of returning to our wholeness and seeking all the barriers we have created between who we think we need to be versus who we truly are - A beacon of Love and light.