How to stop getting triggered
Hello beautiful soul!
If you're reading this, one thing I can be sure of is, awareness is high.
This also means you're doing the inner work.
You're doing the healing, you're investing the time and energy to break free from your limiting beliefs and behaviours.
So why do you feel stuck? And... why are you still triggered?
Most people only work on their mindset. And most people only work on their awareness.
What's missing is integration and embodiment.
Victor Frankl, one of my favourite quotes; "Between stimuli and response there is a space, and in that space lies your freedom."
That "space" between stimuli and response and your capacity to cultivate the will to master this space determines whether you will be hijacked and get triggered vs being able to master your response.
These are the things that are needed:
1. Your level of mind/ body connection.
On a scale of 1-10, how clear is your mind?
On a scale of 1-10, how energised is your body?
If your clarity and vitality are anywhere less than a 9 out of 10 - it's easier to get triggered.
To master that "space" between stimuli and response, it requires an enormous capacity to be in your Heart.
Without being AT LEAST 9/10 for both mind/ body - you're going to be in your head reacting vs responding to a circumstance/ situation/ person.
To transcend your triggers requires you to hold space for yourself so that you can view it from a Higher Level of Mind and a Higher Level of Love.
We only get triggered when we are in our Inner Wounded Child or Depleted states (and this is a score of 8 or less for each of the above questions).
This exercise is what I have my clients master. It is powerful and it will give you an indication of what is needed to reclaim your power.
2. Be aware of the addiction
Look beneath the trigger. What's that feeling?
Is it sadness? loneliness? feeling abandoned? rejection? unloved?
That's the emotional addiction.
This means your body feels safe with these emotions. This is the energetic baseline of your body.
To stop getting triggered, you need to get sober - and break free from the addictions of these emotions.
This is the hardest part of the practice - because before you can get sober, you will go through withdrawal symptoms.
Without going through the physical withdrawal symptoms, you can't master your "response" after the stimuli.
We're only EVER reacting to a chemical reaction in the body. It's not the person or that circumstance we're reacting to.
We're reacting to a thought, that brings up a chemical reaction in the body.
Most people only work on changing their thoughts - however, there is the chemical residue of the reaction still in the body. That needs to be met.
That chemical reaction produces an emotion. Energy in motion.
Knowing this has been a game-changer for my clients. They truly do get "it's a chemical reaction" they are reacting to - and that the energy that is in motion needs to move through NOT be suppressed or blocked.
3. "Is this loving to me?". Ask this question.
Is it loving to you to continuously be disappointed and let down?
Is it loving to you to be reactive?
Is it loving to you to take responsibility for your child/ partner's emotional state?
Is it loving to you to take someone else's opinion about you to heart?
Chances are, you're unconsciously taking actions to create a self-fulfilling prophecy to go back to that baseline of sadness, loneliness, rejection, and feeling unloved.
Being triggered is a symptom of an empty love tank for yourself (and you don't even know that you don't know that this is happening).
You're trying to solve the challenges of your relationships from your mind.
And when we bring the mind into our relationships, we will get triggered.
These challenges require Heart.
The quickest and fastest way to master the space between stimuli and response, and learn to navigate your triggers is to have someone hold space for you.
You wouldn't let someone healing from addiction go it alone.
It requires a safe space, someone to hold space... because the body, for 30+ years has felt safe in feeling sad, lonely, abandoned, rejected, and unloved.
The healing journey is a journey of returning to your Heart - and guiding your body to trust that it's safe to let go of these emotions.
Your body has no idea what life would be like without these emotional addictions.
If you and I can get on a call (limited spots) I can show you the exact steps that are unique to your circumstance on what to do about your triggers with your loved ones.
Sending love,
Yummii xx
PS If ready to stop getting hijacked by your triggers and heal your emotional addictions - Connect with me here: https://www.