What are you afraid of?

What are you afraid of?....

There is an exercise I share with my clients where I ask them to write down "What is disturbing their Heart?"

Throughout our lives, we go through different seasons.

Some seasons are chaotic. Some seasons create an emotional upheaval, and some seasons are smooth sailing.

For the seasons that are chaotic, for the seasons that are heavy and filled with uncertainty, where we feel "check-mate" - it requires us to get grounded.

And to get grounded starts with - acknowledging and accepting - "What is it that I'm afraid of - and What is disturbing my Heart?"

When we can get honest about what is disturbing our Heart and get to the truth of the matter, we recognise that we are separate from the circumstance.

And being able to separate the circumstance from our worthiness, our loveability, and our value is key.

The reason we feel stuck, we are caught up in the overwhelm, the reason we question and ruminate - and get in our heads... is because we have based our worthiness, our lovability, our value on the outcome of a circumstance. 

The attachment, focus and putting all our attention on the outcome of the circumstance isn't what will set us free.

What sets us free is meeting what we're afraid of.

- The failure
- The loss
- The uncertainty
- The unknown
- The disappointment
- The despair

If you're going through a hard season right now, I hope these words are a balm to your Heart.

You are not the failure. Yes, something hasn't worked out - and the outcome has failed. You're not a failure.

You are not a mistake. Yes, you have made a mistake, and you're not a mistake.

You are not unlovable. Yes, they left - they didn't leave you because you weren't good enough or lovable enough or that you didn't do enough. They left because of a perception they had in their mind. It wasn't because you weren't good enough or lovable enough.

Yes, it's terrifying right now, and you want it to work out so badly. I get it - and it doesn't mean anything about you if it doesn't work out.

What cuts off the circulation to our Heart and our connection to life - are the stories we make up about ourselves that reinforce an idea that we are unworthy, not enough, unlovable, unwanted, a disappointment, and that there's something wrong with us.

So here's my invitation.

Take out a piece of paper and write down everything that is disturbing your Heart.

Get honest with yourself. Allow yourself to meet these parts. Fear rises when it's ready to be released.

From that list, write down "What do you make it mean about you if it doesn't work out?"

It's a simple exercise yet really potent. 

From there - actually ask, "Is this story really true?".. When doing this last part, imagine this was your son or your daughter.

If they were experiencing this disturbance to their Heart and they made it mean something about their worth, their value, their lovability - is that story true?

I can 100% guarantee, that as their parent you would say - "Absolutely not!"

So be generous and kind to yourself - as you would your child.

Yes, there are setbacks in life.

Yes, things don't work out.

It didn't work out, because it didn't work out. It doesn't mean anything about you.

Give yourself grace.

Stop being so hard on yourself. Stop beating yourself up. 

You're going through something. And life can get messy at times.

And once again, I'll remind you - it doesn't mean anything about you. 

Sending love,
Yummii xx